Since 50 shades of grey came out it seems more acceptable to talk about one’s kinks. I’ve also discovered on Tik Tok there is a whole genre called Kinktok dedicated to BDSM and how to do it safely, ideas for couples and the whole dynamic. I find it fascinating! I’ve explored it myself with my partner, but we don’t have a dom sub relationship. There are couples who live ‘the lifestyle’ and everything they do is within that dom sub dynamic, and there are other couples who just play together when they have sex.
A lot of people just like to experiment, especially when you’ve been together a long time and the trust is there. Or maybe to spice things up? I’ve done some research and there are a few kinky games to get you in the mood if you want to experiment in BDSM but you don’t know where to start. If you don’t have a partner, you can always take a look at some femdom dating sites to give you some inspiration.
Kinky BDSM game ideas to spice things up
Get a remote controlled sex toy
This can be great if you’re going out for dinner (restrictions permitting) or one of you has to go out somewhere and the other one is in control. Usually used on the female but it can be the other way around, she inserts it or straps it on depending on the toy, then her partner has the remote and can control speed and intensity. You can also get apps on your phone that control the toy!
Count the number
This is basically a spanking game. Get your partner in position and with your ‘weapon’ of choice – could be your hand, a paddle, a crop, get them to count a set number of blows, for example 10 or 20. If they miss a count then you have to start again! Always remember to have a safe word you both agree on in case you need it. If either party says the safe word, then play stops.
Leave instructions
Leave a set of instructions for your partner whilst you are out and they are at home. They can be a mixture of domestic chores and sexier tasks. Examples can be watching porn but not masturbating, wearing a butt plug whilst doing the dishes, recording themselves in a sexy outfit or playing with themselves. If they get all the tasks done within a set time they get a reward, if not then punishment is on the cards!
Meet as strangers
Set a date and time to meet somewhere (restrictions permitting) but go separately and get ready apart. You can also have a different name, and even persona. Maybe you’re usually quite reserved but you want to play the vixen? You won’t meet up and immediately go to each other, instead play it as strangers. If you normally wouldn’t make a move on someone in a bar, use this scenario to try it out. Take it further by secretly booking a room in the hotel and seducing them to go upstairs.
There are a few games you can try, there are loads more – if you’re interested let me know and I can write more about it.
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