As mothers, we know all too well how busy and stressful life can get when our little ones arrive on the scene. Nothing can quite prepare you for the onslaught of things that need to be done, repeatedly. Picking up toys, changing nappies, washing clothes, preparing meals, preparing milk and ensuring your little one’s entertained and happy throughout the day means we struggle to fit in quality time for ourselves. This can leave us feeling exhausted after the day is done and can also lead to us craving some quality time, or even a treat now and then.
So, as we know how busy and overwhelming life can get for busy mothers, maybe now could be the time to treat a friend who is a new mother and may be finding things a bit difficult. Think back to when you were a first time mum – the chances are that it was pretty scary to begin with and you may not even be able to remember some aspects because of how tired you were! If you have a friend, or know someone, who is a new mum, take the time to connect with them. Ask them for a coffee or lunch somewhere and tell them to bring the baby – this way she will feel completely welcome and will not have to worry about getting childcare for those few precious hours out. Make sure wherever you suggest won’t be intimidating for them, check if it’s breastfeeding and family friendly.
You could also even suggest to them that you would be prepared and are more than happy to look after her child for an evening or a couple of hours during the day. This way, she will be able to get out with her other half or family or other friends, or even just have a sleep, knowing her child is safe with you.
Another suggestion to treat a busy mother is to buy her gifts. A bunch of flowers, a card with offers of support, some chocolate goes a long way; or even additions to her household so that she can spruce it up and feel in control of it again. If you want to go down this route, and see furniture as a good gift, do some research on The Longest Stay. Or, if you want to get her a new appliance (a coffee machine is a good idea for those early mornings!) then take a look online and see if there are any good deals available. Or, buy her a book on motherhood and what to expect – there are plenty of quirky options available now, including Dummy, by Man Vs Baby. Nothing too prescriptive though, or she’ll think you’re criticizing her parenting. For more gift ideas check out this guide by You The Daddy. Mostly, new mums want sleep, time for a shower, lunch and adult conversation. The rest is a bonus.
It is important in life to think of others, especially if they are experiencing and going through aspects of life which we have already dealt with. Being a new mum is a difficult experience, and let’s face it, all mothers could do with a helping hand from time to time. Reach out to a friend who is a mother and speak to them about how they are coping, ask if they would like any extra help – even if it is just helping her do the washing up – and always, always congratulate them on how good a job they are doing. It will mean the world to them. Listen to the minutiae of their daily routine and details of their baby. Reassure them about phases, sleeping and eating. Make them laugh, laugh together. Don’t forget the cake.
Disclosure: this is a collaborative post, all opinions are my own
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